Friday, September 16, 2005

In my inbox this morning

I got the following letter in my inbox this morning and I thought it would be of interest...
Bill Maher's open letter to the president:

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote.

But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.

On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.

So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: Take a hint.

Bill Maher


Blogger The Commentator said...

Why am I the only one, it seems anyway, that has grown tiresome of all these 'open letters'? I've yet to see a truly enlightened one. They all stink of arrogant and bored partisanship that hides behind a thin veil of pseudo- sophisticated intellect. Ah, freedom. Let us all squander this precious commodity. Nice site by the way.

9/16/2005 01:19:00 PM  
Blogger Liberal Traitor said...

Commentator, if you'd like to take a stab at a better open letter, I'd be more than happy to run it.

9/16/2005 02:47:00 PM  
Blogger Chandira said...

LOLOLOL.... Awesome.. Thanks for sharing..

9/16/2005 03:53:00 PM  
Anonymous Paul666 said...

Herbert Hoover did concede a whole town to rising water and snakes. I believe the Jamestown Flood happened on his watch. At least I think it happened on his watch. Wasn't he the presedent in 1926 and didn't the Jamestown flood happen in 1926. If I'm wrong, someone plese correct me.

I don't like Bush, but if you compare Bush to someone else at least get your facts staight on what that other person did or didn't do.

Bush can't in any way be blaimed for a natural catastrophy.

Bush should resign for so many things. But not this.

9/17/2005 03:54:00 PM  
Blogger Liberal Traitor said...

I've never even heard of the Jamestown Flood, so I can't say. Bush can't be blamed for the flood itself, but there is no possible denial that his handling of it left quite a bit to be desired.

9/18/2005 08:17:00 AM  
Blogger piksea said...

I love this! I think Mr. Maher has summed up a lot of what I've been thinking for some time. Thanks for posting this.

9/22/2005 11:24:00 AM  
Blogger Bonanza Jellybean said...

I actually saw him do this bit on his show, and it was MUCH better live. I love Maher, even when I don't agree with him.

9/23/2005 01:05:00 PM  

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